Waves - Waves - Waves -- ummm I like it!

Well, I hope you had time to get a donut or bathroom break or get a latte mocha frap no fo (whatever --- )

You know that waves come in all different shapes and sizes. All of them have value and all of them can serve a purpose. Some are generated by wind and yet others by reflection and others still by major events like earthquakes. All in all, I wonder what kind of waves Peter faced when he got out of the boat? I know that once he lost his focus (Jesus) he started to be imersed in the waves. As we face challenges in life, they will come like waves. Some days we barely survive. So why on earth would be jump out of relative safety and into what seems to be the harmful and dangerous path? Because if you can do that and not just survive, but thrive, then you have overcome such a difficulty in life and hurdle that many never escape from - a lack of faith. In differnt variations, a lack of faith can be spiritually deadly!

In all honesty, it is just hard to figure out how much I should write and what you all will understand. So, in reality, it is I that needs the occasional break. Then life begins to interfere and I find that I can't get back to this for a good two to three days. Well, hopefully this will be the second to last post.

So, last March I found myself coming to the quick realization that my time in youth ministry was quickly to come to an end. That in itself can be depressing, but when it leaves you hanging with a family to take care of, that is even more of a challenge. The deepest challenge would be telling my fellow pastors and staff and students. Faith had already gone through so much as far as seeing staff move on. The sense of abondonment was enough to keep crisis counselors in ice packs around Faith! Yet, I knew that our church had really grown spiritually over the past couple of years. The Lord was teaching the families at Faith to rely on Him and not man. So far, after the loss of 6 staff members in 2 years, the church was still thriving and doing well. The Lord had protected us from fall out that many had claimed was forthcoming. The Lord had really helped me during this time understand that my time at Faith was wrapping up as well and that it would be healthy for the church and myself to go through this. Jeanine and I just really lamented over the potential loss of friends and neighbors but were ready to trust God fully.

Now, 8 months later, I can tell you that Faith is doing very well and the Lord is blessing them and that we are doing well and the Lord is blessing us. Thank you to all of our brothers and sisters at Faith and in SCV - we miss you more than you can know - but we are excited about where God has us heading.

So, here is a little timeline to help you understand the chain of events

• Sense change coming / Summer 05
• Jeanine senses that the Lord is preparing her for loss / October 05
• Begin to understand that the Lord may be leading me away from Faith / February 06
• God reveals that the summer of 06 will be the last in Youth Ministry / March 06
• Disclose information to Pastors and Elders / March and April 06
• Disclose to Youth Staff and Students my retirement / May 06
• Attend Youth Pastors Conference at Hume / subject "Transition out of Ministry" / May 06
• Focus on Tanzania summer missions trip / May - June 06
• Tanzania Missions trip / June - July 06
• Summer camp Catalina / Ausgust 06
• Contact with Concord Bible church / August 06
• Candidate with Concrod Bible Church / October 06
• Sr. Pastor of Concord Bible Church / November 06
• Counting my blessings / January 07

Now that is the abridged version - kind of like the Narative - and the next posting will reveal to you the work of God in the midst of all this journey!

You really see God in the details when you choose to look. So, go get a donut again or take a bathroom break or whatever, and tune in to the next posting. Walking on Water - the funnest form of travel - I highly recommend it!!!

Jer

and now for .... the rest of the story!

Our journey is complete my friends. I feel a little like Bilbo at the end of Return of the King writing "There and Back" accept I'm not that short and I don't have a precious - I digress.

So here we are and I have held you at bay now for several months. My last entry was a few days ago and I stated that I had every confidence that the Lord was going to "see through" the sale of our house in Santa Clarita - and He did - we closed the very next day!!! Just more walking on the water my friends. Soooo many prayers that the Lord would allow us to sell our house by the end of the year. Guess what, we closed on the very last business day of the year. It reminds me of scripture that states: Even when we are faithless he is faithful!!

So, earlier I mentioned something about dangerous prayers. I need to start there again (if you don't know what I mean look at the earlier postings). This journey all started for us about a year ago as I was driving down McBean Parkway in Valencia heading to the mall on my day off. I was spending time in prayer while I was driving and I was praying over former staff members that I served with at Faith. That's when the Lord brought to mind Peter and Becca Bunnell. They are dear friends that moved from the comforts of Southern California, family and friends to the outskirts of the world - MONGOLIA - to be missionaries. You know how you always worry that the Lord is going to send to remote places like MONGOLIA to minister? Well it happened to them.

Then something really cool happened. As I was praying for them, I started to be moved to envy. That's right - ENVY! You see, my life of excitement and passion really revolves around acting in Faith. It was at that moment that I really started to wrestle with the fact that I had maybe become to comfortable in the little bubble called Santa Clarita and my very comfortable and wonderful church, Faith. I was compelled to pray a dangerous prayer - I shook off the dusty cobwebs and let the Lord know that I was ready for change - anything was on the table.

The most telling part of that prayer was that I asked the Lord to put my family in a place where we could be most effective - remember this as you read through the journey of being out of the boat.

Ask yourself right now as you read this, " Lord, am I willing to let it all go, to give everything back to you, and be used to the greatest possible extent that my gifts and abilities can carry me through the power of Your Spirit? If not Lord, give me the faith that I lack, help me with my faith and help me to stay focused on you and please call to me and ask me to step out of the boat just like You did with Your servant Peter!"

So, if you want to live in the sweet charity of the grace and power of the Holy Spirit, I would entreat you to consider what in your life is of such great importance and merit that you should keep it from stepping out of the boat. If you can with great confidence locate such a thing, I would suggest you build a shrine in your house and treat it with the upmost importance.

You know what I mean ......... careful Jer ...... you wouldn't want to offend ......

Back to the story -

So, as we came off of a wonderful sabbatical in the summer of 05 the Lord started this work in my heart. What happened next I was unprepared for. You see, I am usually the one in my marriage that is burdened (or graced) with these epiphanies and have to spend time revealing and talking through all the details to my wife. That was about to take a great turn in Nov. of 05.

I came home from work one day and Jeanine was curled up in a blanket on the sofa with her Bible - not such a bad thing - unless she was in that same position when I left for work that day. Anyone who knows my wife knows that she just doesn't act that way, or let circumstances or thoughts overwhelm her to the point of "non-functioning". I started to make the typical blunder of questioning why she spent her entire day on the sofa (which she really didn't) and then the Spirit impressed on me that I should sit down, shut up and listen to what might be going on in my lovely wifes heart and head.

Jeanine revealed that she was deeply troubled and hurting because she believed that the Lord was asking her to prepare for great loss. She had been studying Abraham and how the Lord asked Abraham to pick up and move to a different country - a country that wasn't his own. She couldn't pin point it, but she felt as if we were either going to lose someone close to us through death or the Lord was going to ask us to move soon.

O.K. - now I know how she feels when I come home and drop a bomb on her.

So, we have a dangerous prayer - a wandering and searching pastor - an epiphany of loss -

what could be next?

Stay tuned, take a break and then come back and read more.